Resolutions

Yet again, I haven't found much time for writing.  I've just had another birthday so have decided to make some resolutions for my 42nd year.  So far I've got to:

1. Write more
2. Worry less
3. Read more
4. Go to bed earlier
5. Clear out all of our junk

Munchkin is pretty much potty trained.  Until today, she hadn't had an accident for about two weeks.  She's got a tooth coming through and was too busy screaming at me to notice she was desperate for the toilet.  Night times are going really well.  She's said that she wants to wear Peppa Pig pants to bed and I've told her she can if she can show me that she can keep her pull-ups dry.  She's woken up dry every morning since I said that to her last week.

Here's a brief run-down on what we've done since I last blogged, if I can keep to my resolution, I might go back and blog on some of these in more detail:

• Family holiday in North Devon with Sweetpea & Co.  This went really well and we managed to find lots of activities suitable for toddlers, parents and grandparents.  The weather was also kind to us.
• Party at David Lloyd for Munchkin's twin friends' third birthday.  This was really well done.  It was held in the David Lloyd creche, and everything was laid on by the club.  The party was led by one of the creche staff and food was supplied by the club's restaurant.  It was interesting to learn that you don't have to be a member to book a party there.  I would love to join David Lloyd, but don't think I can afford it!
• Visit to Washbrooks Farm.  This was a very good suggestion for a meet-up by our childless friends.  Munchkin got to see animals, ride on a tractor, play outside on a wide selection of equipment including a brand new bouncing pillow, and go to indoor softplay.

Phew, I've blogged... Must try not to leave it so long next time.

To my mother

I've spent a lot of time thinking about my own mother just recently.  The mother of someone I'm close to has just discovered she's seriously ill so is attempting to spend as much time with her grandchildren as possible.  My mum never had that opportunity, her only grandchild was born six years after her death.  I'm really missing her at the moment, and feel guilty that my grief may be detracting from my friend's concerns about his mother.

Munchkin and I were looking at some old photos today, one of my mum when she was a child and two of my mum and me when I was about the age Munchkin is now.  She quickly realised who the little girls were, and that the woman who looked like me was actually Granny.  I've concluded that Munchkin looks like me, but with Granny's hair and Daddy's eyes.  Munchkin understood the concept that I was once a little girl like her, a lot more readily than when I tried to explain why Granny wasn't at Pops' house when she was in lots of photos with him.  She spent five minutes upstairs looking for Granny that day.  I ended up telling her Granny was in Heaven, and hoped it didn't come back to haunt me when we went on holiday to Devon!

Image courtesy of Marin / Freedigitalphotos.net

My mother taught me a lot about parenting, sometimes without realising it.  Here is a brief selection:

1. The only person who could convincingly tell me everything would be all right, no matter how dire it seemed, was my mum.  I think this should be in the Mother's Job Description.  I'm sure I once read a Caitlin Moran column where she said this was the biggest lie a mother ever tells.  Sorry Ms Moran, I disagree.  It's all about perception.  If you believe everything will be all right -I'm starting to sound like Bob Marley now- you'll find a view of the world that enables you to feel this is the case.
2. Never forget you were once a child.  Children need to be played with, and they require empathy.
3. Potty train as early as possible... Nappies are horrible!
4. "I want doesn't get."  Oh Munchkin, how many times have I said that to you?
5. Be careful what you say to your children and never assume they don't understand.  I can still remember things that my mum said when her first marriage was breaking down.  I would only have been three or four at the time.

You may have gathered that I've taken point 3 to heart.  Potty training is going really well.  Munchkin spent last week on holiday with Sweetpea, who has also just started potty training, and they've been running a toilet relay all week.  I've concluded that we get a 5 minute warning for wees and a 30 second warning for poos.  We took Munchkin swimming without a nappy today.  I assumed it would be fine since her swim nappies have always been empty after lessons.  Thankfully she knows when she needs the toilet, or it could have ended in pool closure.  She pooed in her swimsuit just as we got to the loo.  It will be back to nappies for Friday's lesson.

If I can find the time, I'll blog about our holiday in Devon.  We're off to a birthday party at David Lloyd in Worthing next week, so that might also be worth a mention.

Date Night

Last week's Date Night was much more exciting than anything that's happened this week so I've decided to make it the subject of a blog post.  Angmering  Daddy and I don't go out that often because we're not the type of family with grandparents on the doorstep.  A few months ago, I noticed a bill board advertising a live show by Dave Gorman, one of our favourite comedians.  I looked details up when I got home and found that Dave was doing a series of live shows to test out material for the next season of his TV show, Modern Life is Goodish.  We booked straightaway.  The next challenge would be to find a babysitter.  My lovely step-sister obliged, suggesting that Munchkin joined her five year old daughter for a sleepover.

So Date Night arrived and we took Munchkin over to Lewes to stay with my step-sister.  We set up her Ready Bed in little Flower's room and stayed to play with her and make sure she was settled in.  After about an hour, Munchkin asked us to go home!  It was nice to feel wanted...

Our evening started in Food restaurant in Worthing - somewhere we've wanted to try for ages.  The service was good and the food was superb.  We used the fact that we had time to kill as an excuse for having three courses.  Everything was cooked to perfection.  I had the Calamari, Louisiana Street Food, and Banana Creme Brulee.  AD had Latino Popcorn, Blackened Prawn and Pork Tenderloin, and Cheesecake.  We've been considering going back with Munchkin, but yet again I've been put off by the children's menu.  Why do so many restaurants, even those frequented by "foodies", think that children want chips with everything and assume that the parents are happy with that?

Then we moved on to the main event, Dave Gorman at the Connaught Studio.  I hadn't been to the Studio before so was unaware it was a separate building.  People had to queue outside until the doors opened shortly before the show.  It interesting to learn the Studio used to be The Ritz, which had beem a cinema and a ballroom at different points in the 20th Century.  Dave Gorman was really funny.  The purpose of the live shows is to help him develop scripts.  His audiences have been asked not to post details of the content of these shows online since it would spoil the TV series later in the year, and might make some of the special guests nervous.

It was weird not being woken up by a toddler demanding a cuddle or a cup of milk at 6:30 am the following morning.  Apparently she was well behaved but was too excited to sleep until around 9pm.  Other than decorating her bed with felt-tip and not using the toilet at all, she was the model child.  Since Flower had an inset day, we spent the day in Lewes when I went to pick her up.  She had great fun in the playground at Malling Recreation Ground before we went to lunch at Prezzo, which thankfully had a much better children's menu than some of the independent restaurants I've been to recently.

In potty training news, I still have two Munchkins.  Nursery Munchkin wore pants today and only had one accident.  She then came home, refused to go to the bathroom to get ready for bed, and peed her pants.  I think the next two days at nursery will be fine, but I'm dreading pant wearing on Friday.

Potty Training Week 2

It's as if I have two different children.  Nursery Munchkin is almost potty trained whereas Home Munchkin uses the toilet every now and then.  The Peppa Pig medal for pooing on the toilet has been awarded.  This feat was achieved yesterday... At nursery, of course.  When we arrived to collect Munchkin this evening, we were told that she'd been dry most of the day.  The carers have asked if we want to send her to nursery in knickers next week.  I'll probably send her in the Bambino Mio training pants since she prefers those to the Flip. 

The unworn pairs of Flip pants went back to Lizzie's Real Nappies.  Lizzie commented that they were the best on the market, but the manufacturer hasn't got it quite right yet.  We probably will use the remaining pairs but I was hoping they'd be a substitute for pull-ups and that hasn't been the case.

Peppa Pig Medal

Home Munchkin has been a nightmare.  She has regressed to only using the toilet a couple of times a day and doing everything else in her pull-ups.  And the tantrums... Well, where do I start?  Public screaming fits about going to the toilet and/or wearing nappies, refusing to get dressed, refusing to go to bed... The list goes on... She's been driving me to distraction.  I'm somewhat anxious at the best of times and I just haven't known what to do.

I've tried ignoring her, the "broken record" technique of repeating myself continuously until she gives in, negotiating and letting her do what she wants.  Nothing seems to work very well.  Angmering Daddy thinks negotiation is the way forward but I'm not convinced.  I think she behaves worse for me because she picks up on my anxiety.  She's made me cry twice this week.  I'm trying to find some mindfulness training to help with my anxiety and have also reserved ToddlerCalm by Sarah Ockwell-Smith from the library.  However, AD is really annoyed with me.  He says that you learn to be a parent by being a parent and books are pointless.  I'm still going to read it though!

Hopefully my next blog will be about something more exciting than toilets.  Munchkin had her first sleepover at the weekend when AD and I went on a date, and we've also been to Ferring Country Centre, which has had an upgrade since our last visit, so there's plenty to tell if only I can find the time.

Potty Training Week 1: Lessons Learned

Well, potty training has definitely had its ups and downs over the past few days.  Here is a list of lessons learned so far:

1. Flip training pant inserts have a girls' way and a boys' way.  My daughter was wearing them the boys' way.
2. Munchkin views going to the loo as a recreational activity. She'll only go if she's near a bathroom and/or someone else wants to go.  When she does something on the toilet, she gets very excited.  Most of the time she goes in her pants because it's quicker.
3. Flip training pants are not as absorbent as disposable pull ups, unless you use multiple inserts.  If you do this, the pants become so bulky, most self respecting toddlers don't want to wear them.
4. Like several other toddlers I know, Munchkin doesn't much care if she's a bit wet.  She was no more keen to get out of soggy training pants than she would have been to get out of an absorbent nappy.
5. The inserts in Flip training pants bunch up in the middle, meaning it's difficult to get the absorbent bit where it's really needed.
6. Our plans to keep Munchkin home all weekend so she could get used to fabric pants backfired.  She got stir crazy and started to regress.
7. Potty training can be really stressful if you don't approach it in a way that works for you and your child.  The last time I felt as bad as I did yesterday, I had post natal depression.
8. Pull ups aren't so bad after all.  I had a long chat with Munchkin and she agreed to wear them.  They've meant we can leave the house, and she can use the toilet whenever she fancies.
9. Portable toilet seats are a godsend.  We have a Toodaloo.  It folds to the size of a couple of nappies and means that Munchkin can sit on any toilet without my having to hold her.
10. My child has a sprinkler attachment.  I have to wipe down her toilet seat after she's finished.

Pants!

Munchkin and I have been too grumpy and busy for blogging recently so you've missed out on two epic tantrums and a family trip to Fisher's Farm.  We'll be going back to Fisher's Farm so I'll blog about that another time.  The least said about the tantrums, the better, though I would like to thank the helpful stranger who got us moved to a later swimming lesson when Munchkin's pool tantrum finally ended.

Munchkin is getting closer and closer to being potty trained.  She doesn't like nappies very much and hates pull-ups but my attempt to put her in standard training pants ended in a puddle, partly because they weren't absorbent enough but mainly because they didn't fit snugly around the legs.  There was no way I could put her straight into knickers, since she was doing half her wees and all her poos in nappies.  I still felt cloth training pants were the answer, but I needed to find the right brand.

I didn't have much idea where to look.  Luckily, Laura from Worthing Nappy Library came to my rescue.  She very kindly contacted other nappy libraries to get recommendations for absorbent training pants.  Two American brands, Super Undies and Bumgenius Flip, were recommended.  Super Undies were out of stock everywhere, which was a shame because they were cheaper and more slimline.  I therefore invested in some Bumgenius.  These pants are adjustable so one size fits age 18 months to 4 years.  They have removable inserts which can be changed if the child has only done a wee.  I initially bought three pairs when they were on offer at The Nappy Lady.  The offer price was £21.49, or thereabouts, for a pair of pants and three inserts.  I wish I'd bought more since I've just paid the full price of £27.99 for additional pairs.  I got the additional pairs from Lizzies Real Nappies because they had a better range of designs, in my opinion.  There seems to be a market for second-hand real nappies so I'm hoping to recoup some of my money when she moves on from these pants.

Munchkin's first pants... They've got bunnies on :-)

We had a nappy dry run yesterday.  Munchkin liked her pants, and it almost was a dry run too.  In three hours, she only did one small wee in them.  They're not as easy to get up and down as I'd hoped so we might have to try loosening them.  I did also put them on back-to-front initially, though I'm not sure I should admit to that...  At the weekend, we'll start potty training properly.  Hopefully I've bought my last daytime nappies.  Angmering Daddy has told Munchkin she can have a Peppa Pig medal when she poos on the toilet... I look forward to making it for her.

Duck!

We like ducks in the AM household.  "Duck", was Munchkin's first word, well over a year ago now.  We all love feeding the ducks at Mewsbrook Park in Littlehampton.  Despite this, I was somewhat annoyed when Angmering Daddy announced that he'd bought us an annual membership to the Wildfowl and Wetlands Trust.  We'd probably use it once, then the cards would sit at the back of our wallets until the renewal came through and we realised we'd forgotten to cancel it.  Well, that's what happened with English Heritage and National Trust, anyway.

I hate to admit it, but I was wrong.  We've been to the Arundel Centre three times since AD was "conned" into signing up at a local garden centre.  Our membership was £63 and it would have cost us £71.70 if we'd paid on the door each time.  Munchkin goes free until she's four, so we'll make the most of that as well.  We've tended to go for a morning stroll, then stay for lunch in the cafe.

We're not avid bird watchers or serious photographers, we just find it a pleasant place for a day out.  In the past we've made a day of it, and taken a picnic.  We generally take the same route, so we start off in the area where bird feeding is permitted.  -This is something WWT need to be clearer about. Every time we visit, there are people feeding birds where they shouldn't be.- When Munchkin is a bit older, we'll give pond dipping a try.  We take the boat safari towards the end of our visit.  Munchkin usually insists in going to the playground just before we leave.

The Centre puts on family activities from time to time.  We're hoping to try some craft activities, though these tend to be in the school holidays so may be busy.  I need to find out if any mummy friends are members, since it's an easy place to get to for a meet up.

In other news, we are finally potty training... Munchkin does something on the toilet pretty much every time she sits on it.  The trouble is, she still goes in her nappy between toilet visits... Sigh...